Eye, Eye

I had to get my cataracts seen to and found out that I’m not as special as I thought I was. Just about everyone I spoke to had already had theirs done; I guess I’m a late bloomer.

They gave me my appointment time of 7:50 am. I laughed because I thought they were joking, but they weren’t. We got up at 6:00 and made the drive into town.

I arrived at the hospital with lots of time to spare and checked in. Rosalie came with me to find out my pickup time and to make sure I didn’t make a run for it.

She took off and left me to it and I was told to be a good boy and sit in the waiting room. A few minutes later, a lovely nurse called my name and ushered me into her office. First, she took my blood pressure which was a little high. (Well she was a lovely nurse.)

Then she placed a hair net on my head. I think this was for the staff’s amusement as I got a lot of smirks from patients passing by. Little did they know that they would be wearing one pretty soon.

Then she gave me my first of many eye drops.

Between drops, she asked me all sorts of questions. The main ones being, name, rank, and serial number. Or, full name, date of birth and which eye was getting done. After this interrogation was done she explained the whole procedure. She also offered me a sedative but I refused; I am a man after all.

Next, she took me and sat me in full public view with my silly hat. By this time there were a few others with hair nets so we could look at everyone else with disdain and ask why they weren’t a member of our club.

After a while, another nurse came to get me and asked all the same questions again. She led me into an operating room where about six more people looked at me as though I was the latest offering. Another nurse took the clipboard and asked me all the same questions again as well as making me point to the offending eye.

Then I was led to an operating table where they made me comfortable with a nice warm blanket.

The surgeon introduced himself and explained the procedure again. It was quite painless and over in ten minutes. All I had to do was look at a bright light and while he did his thing it changed shapes and looked weird. He slapped a clear plastic shield on the eye and said “All done” and I was out of there. So soon? I felt as though I hadn’t got my money’s worth.

Rosalie drove me home, which was the scariest part of the whole deal, and I started to recuperate.

I have to go through this again with the other eye; I sure hope I get the same pre-op nurse.